What A Year!

2011 brought many ups and downs, but mostly ups!     Below are the best of for each month:

• January - I didn't have to go on the yearly 11 day business trip to Hawaii this year!  (yes that really is a positive for me)
• February - took my second (business) trip to San Diego, but this one for a week and fell in love with the town.
• March and April - can't remember anything from these months...probably too busy with work :(
• May:
• Adam got a job back in the industry his background is in and he prefers to be in - automotive!   
• We got in touch with family we didn't know/hadn't talked to in a long time on both sides (mine and Adam's).   In May it was Adam's side - I think it was a little later in the year that we got in touch with family from my side.
• June:
• We joined facebook - although I'm still not sure if that's a positive or negative, because now I'm addicted...
• Adam and I celebrated our first year of marriage and went to our new favorite shore town to celebrate - Cape May!  
• July: I started this blog, giving myself the ability to share my personal journeys and random thoughts with my friends, family and whoever else may end up reading this.
• August: We had our first "real" east coast earthquake of my lifetime - which I feel jipped because I didn't feel it - and then Hurricane Irene landed in the area a few days later- which really was not as bad as was predicted.
• September: Got back into my walking and walked the Rochester Half Marathon - now Ive got the itch back and am thinking of doing the Goofy Challenge at the Disney Marathon in 2013 and maybe another 3-day soon.
• October: We adopted our second dog - this time a young puppy who we name Kalas - for you non-Philly folk, his name is in honor of Harry Kalas, a HOF Phillies announcer who passed away in 09..
• November: My younger sister got married, the last of the weddings my parents put on.
• December:  Still a few hours left - so the best might still be to come :)

I know that this was a tough year for many people, and it also had some negatives for us - mostly dealing with my ILs - but all in all, it was a great year for us - so I'm wishing that 2012 brings my friends, family, coworkers, acquaintances, strangers and of course Adam and I the happiness and health that 2011 brought us..

A Personal Vendetta

This will be a nice short post :)   A while ago I wanted to write something about this, and I never got around to it, but when I was in the office yesterday, I overheard one of my co-workers mention ADT.     If anyone out there is looking for home security - I have a personal vendetta against ADT.   

There are plenty of other companies out there, please consider them.   From a customer service perspective, a local company will be able to provide you with better service.    As always make sure you do your research - and if you find ADT is the best choice for you - then so be it - but they don't treat their employee's well and have horrible customer service once the security system is installed.

When Hubby was working for Broadview, they got bought out by ADT, and he ended up losing a lot of installations, because when he went to go install it, he had to alert the customer that they were just purchased by ADT, and the customer went with Broadview to get away from ADT, so they weren't willing to have the installation occur and sign the paperwork.   This situation did not just happen once or twice, I remember hubby coming home MANY times from not doing an installation because this scenario was playing out.

There is more to my personal vendetta, but I'm choosing not to put that online just in case - feel free to talk to me personally for the full, long, drawn out story.   Or if you don't know me - leave a comment with an email and I will consider putting it in email.

Breastfeeding at Target

There was recently a breastfeeding sit-in at Target stores nationwide because of an issue that occurred last month at one in Texas.   If you are unfamiliar with the story - go here to read about it (or just google target breast feeding news, and plenty of stories will pop up)

The way Target employees handled the original situation was completely wrong.   To continuously walk past a nursing mother and make her feel bad and torment her is completely wrong - she is just doing something natural.

But with that being said, I do think the woman could have handled this better from the beginning.   I am not a mother, so you can all take my comments with a grain of salt, but I do have family members and friends who have breastfed, and I don't know any of them who would have just sat in the middle of the women's section and started to breastfeed.  

This has nothing to do with doing it in public, I completely agree that it is a natural thing and one shouldn't have to hide.   I was out with my friends the other month in a mall and we stopped to grab a drink and have a seat at one of the tables in the middle of the mall, and my friends baby was getting hungry and she breastfed right there - and I had absolutely no problems with that - it is normal.

But there is something to be said for finding an appropriate place in public.     Go to the furniture section and sit on a chair where you aren't just in the middle of an aisleway; go to the food area (all Target's have something in the front of the store) and breastfeed there.   In public is completely acceptable, in the middle of some random location isn't.

If you weren't breastfeeding and your baby was starving and you had to feed them.    Are you going to stop right in the center of a section, sit on the floor and pop out the formula and start feeding the kid?   No - you are gonna find a place out of the way to sit down and get it done.

Again - the Target employees who ridiculed the woman were completely wrong - and should be punished.   But this woman, and all people out there, should use some common sense.   

One day I hope to be a mother, and if/when that happens, I hope to be able to breastfeed.   When that happens, I promise you that I will not hide my breastfeeding, but that I will also do it appropriately, finding a location that is not in the middle of other people's way.

The end is near...

So you have all read my many posts about my ILs, specifically about my MIL.   Before I continue with this post, I just want to make it clear for all the past posts and any future posts.  As horrible as they treat Hubby and I and as much as we bitch about them, that is pretty much as far as it will go from our side.  

I use this blog as my sort of public journal.   For all, but them, to read.  Its my place where I can write what Im feeling and thinking and that be the end of it.   The Dear MIL letters I have written in the past and have thought about for future posts, are just blog posts.   This is place for me to write it, you to see it, be entertained by their craziness and comment on it.

As much as I would like to tell my ILs that they are about to lose a relationship with Hubby and I and any future children we have, unlike them, I am unable to cut ties with family members and have my children grow up without their (crazy) grandparents if they are alive and well.   I say unlike them because that is important in this post.  

The background on the "unlike them" part is that they have cut ties with almost all family except for Hubby and Hubby's brother and his family.   They have cut ties with MILs sisters and their family and hate the fact that we recently have chosen to have a relationship with them.   They have a bad relationship with MILs father and significant other, and treat them like crap and hate that we all chose to have a relationship with them.   And the only reason they even have a (bad) relationship with MILs father is because he continues to make the effort, and is the only one to do so - g-d forbid she contacts him.   They barely talk to FILs brother and family anymore, although they haven't been completely cut off like MILs family.    FILs mother is in a nursing home and Id be shocked to find out that he visits her even once a month.     FILs cousins have not been cut out, but they don't talk to them.   They were invited to our wedding, but wedding festivities is/are the only time I have seen them in my entire time with Hubby.

So now that you understand all of that...

It looks like the end is near in regards to our relationship and our future childrens relationship with my ILs.    Hubby received an email yesterday from his dad that pretty much trashed me, called hubby cruel and made an attempt to end a relationship with us.   Here is the last paragraph from the email:

I do not know you any more and I am sad at the cold cruel person you have become. I thought we raised better than the person you have become. The time has come for you make a decision. All I ask is that you do it soon so Mom and I can move on with our lives with or without you and Lynda in it.

I drafted a response for Hubby to edit and send (hubby isn't good with those things, so I start them off and then let him go from there).   As of 2 hours ago, he said the letter is perfect as is, but isn't sure what he wants to do yet, so I think its still sitting in drafts.

The letter is not cruel like theirs and pretty much says that it is up to them to accept us for who we are, and we will never make a decision to cut anyone out of our family, but if that is what they want, then they can make that decision.    It also says that if they chose not to make that decision, then they need to learn to treat us with the respect that we deserve, and, as always, the same courtesy will be returned to them.

I was taught that you are born into a family, and you don't get to chose them, you accept them for who they are.   We bitch about them, but we understand this concept.   I just wish they would understand that.

What a great start to the week...

After going to bed at 9:30pm last night, I woke up today after hitting snooze for 1 hour 40 minutes (although I don't remember hearing the alarm or hitting snooze for the first hour).   You'd think 8 hours of sleep would be more than enough when I normally get 6 hours, but apparently my body really wanted to get to 9+ hours of sleep.

After getting a really late start to my morning I go downstairs to see LOADS of frost on the ground, which means I can't just run out the door - although that ended up being a good thing, because I forgot how much of a mess I left the kitchen after giving up on coating my first round of truffles.

After finally getting on the road, traffic wasn't so bad to get to 295, and then as soon as I got to 295 I found out that Hubby's place of employment wanted to kill my car and myself.   I had my car in the shop on saturday because the battery light was going on.   The good news is that my battery was just really dirty and needed to be cleaned.   The bad news is that they never fully shut my hood, and it wasn't noticeable until I got on the highway and all the sudden my hood was shaking and looked like it wasn't very far away from flying off and causing an accident.   Luckily, I noticed it quick enough and was able to get over to the shoulder and slam it closed - but WOAH!  

Once I got on the road, traffic came to a screeching halt - there was a one-car accident up ahead.   Stupid people don't know how to drive.   When I finally passed that, the guy in front of me refused to go above 60 in the left lane - and the speed limit is 65 AND he was in the freaking left lane.  

After finally getting around him, the rest was smooth sailing - and amazingly, work has been the same as well - FINGERS CROSSED.

Looking forward to a short work week and a long weekend.    And eventually finishing all of my holiday baking tonight (hopefully, but possibly tomorrow night).

Hope you all had a better start to the day than me :)

Response to my IL

So my MIL just (finally) responded to the invite that she received, but claims she never saw.    I only saw this response because a friend alerted me to the response and specifically commented on how much of an ass they are for that response.   With that, I decided I was going to email her, and then I really started to be a bitch and I know I can't send it, but I also can't tame it down - so maybe you all can help me tame it down?   Here is what I have so far (as you can tell, I finally hit my point with them, and as you can also tell, my very violent response highlighted in my last point is not the direction I would really go when I hit my point, and instead I would go in this direction).

I just wanted to let you know that your hostility-filled response is not just seen by Adam and I - its seen by everyone on the invite.    And in all honesty the only reason I actually saw it is because I had multiple friends who saw your response and emailed me about it to see what your issue was.  

 

Furthermore, although you guys didn't see the invitation until 12/12, this invite was sent out to you at the same time it was sent out to everyone else - 2 months ago.    When I re-sent you the invitation on 12/12, it was exactly that.   I had to do a re-send, not invite someone new.   I'm sorry that you somehow did not see the original invitation, but that is not a reason to take it out on us and start a new fight up with Adam.    

 

Lastly, this email was sent solely by me, so when you have an issue with it, take it up with me - not with Adam.   I'm sick of you guys constantly emailing and calling him to yell at him when most of your issues boil down to me.    Ive about had enough of it and your childish antics.  

Don't worry - I didn't press send, I just closed out the email, but I really do want to say something - and specifically let them know that their antics are being seen by others outside of us - and by their own accord.

I guess it could be worse...

So a co-worker just sent me this article about bad in-laws...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/12/12/bad-in-laws-tweeters_n_1140357.html?icid=maing-grid7|maing7|dl20|sec3_lnk1|119587#s533942&title=Jonna